


i'll see you through

by sunbaenims



Category: Infinite (Band)
Genre: Drinking, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-11
Updated: 2016-08-11
Packaged: 2018-08-08 04:55:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 933
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7744153
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunbaenims/pseuds/sunbaenims
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>sunggyu can see pieces of cake still stuck to sungyeol's hair.</p>
            </blockquote>





	i'll see you through

Sunggyu finds Sungyeol on the steps leading up to the rooftop. Dongwoo's laughter echoes from behind him as Sunggyu slips into the open space next to Sungyeol.

“What are you doing out here?" It's dark. Sunggyu can see pieces of cake still stuck to Sungyeol's hair. “Did Woohyun and Dongwoo's loudness chase you out of the apartment?"

He takes a sip of his soju. Howon had bought the drinks. He still hasn't let go of his habit of going for the cheapest kind. “Thinking, I guess." Sungyeol says, and Sunggyu watches him with his lips on the neck of his bottle. There's a flush on Sungyeol's cheeks and sombreness that only comes with enough alcohol in his body.

Sunggyu hums, a thoughtful sound, resting his elbows on his knees. “About your birthday? Do you feel old?" he smiles and nudges Sungyeol's side, attempting playfulness.

Sungyeol doesn't bite. “Yes." he leans back and takes a large gulp of his drink, his eyes squeezed shut. He rarely enjoys the strong taste.

Sunggyu scratches at his cheek with a finger and feels stubble. “You're twenty four, Sungyeol, not thirty." It comes out harsher than he’d meant.

Sungyeol looks at him, eyes glazed over. He has an elbow on the step behind him, long legs stretched out in front of him. “I just feel..." his words come out slow, like he's trying to make sense of his feelings in his head. “Unaccomplished."

“Unaccomplished?" Sunggyu repeats, tasting soju on his tongue. “We're going on our second world tour in a few days, and you feel unaccomplished?"

“It's not that, hyung." Sungyeol's shorts are frayed at the bottom where he's picking at them with long fingers. “It's not Infinite. It's me."

“Is Infinite not enough of an accomplishment for you?" Sunggyu asks. It feels like he's talking to himself. “You _are_ Infinite, Sungyeol."

Sungyeol looks at him, mouth slack. No smirks. Honest eyes and questioning gaze and they're back in Bangkok, the private booth in the New York City restaurant, Sunggyu's bed in Paris. “Was it enough for you, hyung?" Sunggyu's stomach is twisting up. “Before your solo albums, and the variety shows..."

It wasn't. Sungyeol knows it, it’s why he's asking. “No," Sunggyu says. He’d never wanted Infinite. He wanted the stage and self composed songs and collaborations with Nell. “But..."

“It's not like I’m trapped doing something I don't want." Sungyeol's words are mellow. They wouldn't be, if he wasn't holding his third bottle in his hand. “I would quit, if I was." He would. He would've upped and left. Sunggyu knows him enough to know that. Knows him a lot better than that. “It's... it's the thing that I wanted the most, I have not accomplished anything in."

“Sungyeol." TV screens are Sungyeol's stage. Sunggyu tugs on his sleeve, and feels a burn in his chest. “Your dramas didn't do badly. You act well. You've got a main role in a drama airing next month."

“Which I wouldn't have gotten if Jungryoul hyung wasn't as persistent as he is." The bitterness in Sungyeol's voice is heavy. Sunggyu wonders if it tastes like it had for him, three years ago. “I want callbacks. I want what Hoya got."

Encouragement. Leader duties. Sunggyu can do this. “You'll get there.” Sungyeol, though, right now, isn't Sunggyu's member. Sungyeol, right now, is... “Do you remember, how long it took us to get first place? To hold our first concert? How long it took for—" This is Sungyeol. It's okay. “For my music, to do well?"

Sungyeol's hair is falling into his eyes. Sunggyu's fingers itch to push it back. “But right now, hyung," says Sungyeol, gaze finding Sunggyu's, and Sunggyu feels his ribs pressing in. “I feel like it might never happen for me."

Two years ago, Sunggyu would have known what to do. He would have known how to steal Sungyeol's breath and chase away his thoughts. He would have known how to make this better. “Hey," he says, softly. Setting his bottle down on the step below, he rests his hand on Sungyeol's thigh. The skin is warm when Sunggyu grips it gently. “You'll get there. Maybe..." The itch is gone. “Maybe next month, or next year. But it will happen for you, Sungyeol."

“Thanks, hyung." The hairs on the back of Sunggyu's neck are standing. Sungyeol is staring, like he sees hope in Sunggyu's eyes.

“And..." Breathe in, breathe out. There's no one around. It's just him and Sungyeol. Sunggyu closes his eyes. “I’ll be here, until it does." Eyes open. It's okay. “You know that, right?"

It's like a game. Push and pull. “I know," Sungyeol says, and he is so close. His gaze is pulling and Sunggyu is going, and Sungyeol's breath is on his lips. There are Sungyeol's eyes, piercing through Sunggyu, and his cheeks, and pretty pink mouth.

Their cheeks touch and Sunggyu's eyes fall shut. In the dark, his trembling lips find Sungyeol's, touch the corner, and for a moment, it's not okay. It's not okay, and nothing has ever felt better.

When Sunggyu pulls back, the game is over. His chest is hollow and he is smiling. “You know it?"

Swallowing, Sungyeol drops his gaze. One heartbeat. Two three. Four. Sungyeol looks up. “I do," he says, smiling, and Sunggyu can breathe. Sungyeol pushes at his shoulder, a friendly shove, and they're okay.

“Good," Sunggyu laughs. He pats Sungyeol's knee and stands up, pausing halfway to the apartment. He looks over his shoulder. “You coming?"

“Yeah, hyung," Sungyeol bounces up from the step, and laughs when he stumbles.

Yeah. It's okay.


End file.
